Update!! Our Journey... 7 years later continues...

The funny thing about kinky life is that it changes sometimes faster than we can keep up with. We left off with our last post on lactation about 7 years ago. Then, we were partners, switches, friends, falling in love slowly one session, one text at a time. September, 2103 was when Morgan finally admitted he loved me, although I always knew... he showed me every meeting, every date. Something special happened in 2013, and everyday since then. 

Our vanilla and kinky lives meshed together that year, when we both decided that our relationship was more than, just play partners, friends, switches. Morgan bought me a mug that said "Crazy might just work" and after that the crazy consumed us. In 2014 we started dating officially, met each others families, and worked toward figuring out how to mesh our real lives with our kinky lives. It was tricky, complicated, and forced us to lost track of our blog posting.  We wanted to, thought about it, but life was busy, as it happens. 

Since then we got engaged in 2015, married in 2018, and have now been happily married for 2 years. The journey of course is not quite that simple, and during this time our relationship grew, as did our kink preferences. It is a funny thing how I swing back and forth between wanting to be on top to craving the bottom. In 2014 I began to top more than bottom, and Morgan began giving up the keys more and more until I solely identified as a dominant top, him the submissive. We've pretty much stayed this way except for the occasional need for me to have a good session. I trust him with my life, and would trust no one else with my body. 

I have more hormones than him so I am controlled by random feelings and cravings, and once and a while I just really crave total surrender. There is no safer place than on my knees, head in Morgan's lap, his hands on my body. Recently, with the crazy COVID stay home order, life and work is insane, and so busy that I find myself overwhelmed most of the time. Add that to Morgan having an injury for the past 6 months, to all our kink events being cancelled... well it is a recipe for disaster... or in my case self-combustion. Oh and there is also this tiny little thing called menopause that has really hit me hard... like HARD. Some days I don't even recognize myself.... I used to be regular... predictable, but now? Nope, now I'm like on this crazy cycle of the unknown....no one knows truly what I'll wake up like. Yeah, I know scary for everyone. Which brings me to my current status... unknown. 

Morgan... is finally feeling better pretty much 100% recovered from his surgery/injury... his hormones are just fine...no changes... which brings me back to me... I cannot even decide what coffee creamer to get let alone decide what implement to use, it is a strange place to be. It started last summer... when I started feeling the urge to submit again, like really submit. I even let one of my favorite girlfriends single tail whip me at a public event... And I pretty much fell back down the submissive rabbit hole after that. I need to submit, I crave it, and desperately need the control taken away from me for a while. In my vanilla life I have to be in charge of everything... literally, and I need a vacation from myself. I need the freedom that only deep submission can bring about. So, were we are back in the roles where we began... Morgan on top and me on my knees...submitting to him. Strange how life takes us in circles, like the moon... 

We grow, change, and evolve into more of ourselves. Don't get me wrong there is this bad ass Domme still inside me (I'll write a few posts on that later, we've got so many fun stories to share) But for now I'm starting off back where I'm at, on my knees... at his service.

~ Jade